Thursday, October 11, 2007

Things I have learned in the last 86400 seconds

Being a learning creature (and by no definition an "old dog,") I occasionally stumble over kernels of wisdom that force me to reshape my mental schema that, forever more, impact the way I live my life, and that help me to adapt to an ever-confusing environment. Here's what's been the topic of my metacognitive sessions in the last 86400 seconds.

  • If it ain't broke, don't fix it. I'm not broke, so it's time to fix myself.
  • The worse thing to do with methods that have proven successful is to continue to use those methods that have proven to be successful.
  • When standing atop a normal distribution curve, there is only one way to go, and it's to slide down the slope to the right, and that's a bad thing.
  • When others emulate your success, it's time to emulate their lack of it.
  • When nothing is wrong, that's what's wrong.
  • It's OK to contradict yourself in the same sentence, although it is unacceptable to do so.
  • When speaking to a group of large, angry, hungry lions, it's best to keep telling them to focus on being positive.
  • The best way to improve morale is through the use of post-it notes and fluorescent highlighters.
  • It's amazing how much recycling material one can pick up in the course of a three hour meeting.
  • The only consistency is inconsistency.
  • Colleagues can be fun to converse with, especially when there is a common topic of ridicule.
  • Google is God.
  • In a group of 70, there is high probability that at least 5 of them were not invited to be there.
  • When sitting through a meeting in an uncomfortable, plastic chair, both of your ends tend to go numb.
  • A spoonful of sugar cannot mask a bitter taste.
  • Sometimes it is fun to imagine that you are nothing more than a audience member watching a play, either a comedy or a tragedy.
And finally
  • At most meetings, minutes are kept and hours are wasted.


Brenda said...

Somebody's not a fan of meetings...

kwkorpi said...

I will excuse your understatement!