Leaves be turned

I can't believe I've gone and done it. I never thought it could, much less would, happen. I'm still a little shocked that I did it. It feels so . . . . so . . . . dishonest, yet liberating at the same time. It's something I have always dreamed of doing in a perfect world, a world far apart from my reality. I'm even afraid to write about it, in case this IS just some dream I'm having and that what I did today actually hasn't take place in reality. I'm too excited, however, NOT to write about it, so I think I will. Besides, I think I might like to see how it looks in print, being able to read and re-read about my accomplishment over and over and over again, even if it DOES turn out to only be in the ephemeral, fantastical realms of my dreams.

So what did I do? Well I hope you don't think that what I did was insignificant in any sense of the word, or that my successful occurrence is any less remarkable for me, merely because you might do it on a daily basis. I am not you. You are not me. I dare you to throw a rock from your glass house. And by the way, turn out the lights when you change clothes, will ya? Don't judge me by YOUR standards of what is phenomenal or praiseworthy. I've got scruples and morals and very tender heart. How dare you claim that my attainment is anything less than a groundbreaking feat in my life. That it is anything less than me turning over a new leaf, turning a corner, getting a new lease on life, or reaching a new standard of living by which I can now live my life. Just because everyone else has been doing something for a long time, doesn't make it right, nor does it make it for everyone. I've chosen to "hold out" for some time now out of a sense of moral duty, primarily, but maybe out of weakness. Well, excuse me if it takes me a little bit longer to realize things for myself. That's only more reason for me to celebrate today.

So really, what did I do? Well I know you read this blog for entertainment, and I DO try to be as amusing as possible, and I don't really want to bore you with the details. Besides, it's not a "funny" or "dramatic" thing that I did today. It's not something that you'd ever see on a "Everybody Loves Raymond" or "Grey's Anatomy." It's not even something you'd ever see on PBS! No, it's smaller and more boring than that. You won't ever see it on the Silver Screen, although I could see Christian Bale portraying me doing it quite well, for which he'd win the Oscar for "Lead Actor in the most boring, insignificant, anti-climactic film." It's a movie YOU wouldn't want to see, but I definitely would (especially after watching "The Dark Knight" twice in theaters.) It's not even a book-worthy effectuation, hardly worth a page of note. Essay you say? Only if it's an essay about how it could possibly change my life. Now a song . . . . hmmmm. It might make a good song . . . . an inspirational song, perhaps . . . . . sung by Josh Groban . . . . no! Christian Bale . . . . Ya! Christian Bale . . . . does he sing? . . . . . It doesn't matter . . . .I'd listen to it . . . . wait a minute . . . . . I could WRITE it!!!!! But I digest (I do! You do too!)

Anyway, I don't want to keep you in suspense any longer (but I do) at the risk of losing you as a reader of this blog (I'd be down to only two people) so I might as well share with you what I'm so darn proud of doing today, a day I'd never thought I live to see, something I never thought I've ever muster the courage to do. What DID I do today?

I said, "No!"