Too Young To Feel This Old

It seems only natural after planning my funeral on the last blog, to give equal time to talking about my birth on the next one. Having said that, "Happy Birthday to Me." Yep, exactly 34 years ago today, in the SouthTexas city of McAllen, born as the second of three children to a loving family, I came into this world. My how the years have passed since then. As I now make my living "preaching" the word of math on a daily basis, at birth, I was so excited to be in this world, I was literally speechless for about 15 months. Quickly learning to talk and walk, I've been doing it ever since: talking the talk and walking the walk.

I think about all the great things I've done in my relatively short time on Earth, and I think about all the many things I'd still like to do before that funeral plan is implemented. But seeing how the last 10 years has gone by about as quickly as the previous five, it seems like time is accelerating as I get older (positive second derivative, or concave up.) At this rate, I'll be 55 by the time I'm 40, or at least feel like it. With something new aching each day, from bad knees, to pulled hamstrings, to shooting pains in my shoulder, stiff neck, piercing headaches, blistered feet, crooked spine, and ingrown toenails, I actually look forward to soaking in Epsom salt, and I know I couldn't function each day without my 6 pills I take each morning from my "old people's" pill library dispenser.

Had I been as wise as I am today 15 years ago, I'd be in much better shape. Unfortunately, with my myriad of skateboarding injuries from my youth, ranging from 6 concussions, compound fractures of the left radius and ulna, broken front teeth, and too many cuts and scrapes requiring stitches, staples, glue, or butterflies, to the consequences of my cliff diving, rope swinging, and diving board injuries, I didn't take care of my body. It's funny how I'll be feeling that short phase of my life for the rest of my years. What's more, I was so timid and craven as a small child (less than or equal to 10 years old), that I was too scared to even get on the kiddie coaster at Astroworld. Little did I know than that I would turn that overly-cautious, cowardly disposition around pi radians (180 degrees) when I became a teenager, throwing caution to the wind, doing anything for a cheap thrill and the attention.

I'd like to think my wife for awakening me to the senses of my pre-adolescent years (with one, small ACL-tearing incident aside), whereby I have returned to the cautious, calculating, responsible person once again. In fact, as I see my seven-year-old son and four-year-old daughter exhibit the same guarded temerity, my desire for them to be assertive and adventurous are overshadowed by my relief that their temperaments will minimize the distress in my life, as I don't need to worry about what dangerous act they're doing behind my back. If only my mother could have been so lucky.

But then again, they ARE both still just pre-adolescents who are more like their mother. Only time will tell if they go through their father's stage of reckless abandon. For them, that's still some time away. For me, it will be here tomorrow. By then, I'll be taking a few more pills and looking into hair transplants.